Jurai no Nozomi: Snippet "Nozomi and Washu"
One of many scenes which became redundant as soon as Kindred was written ;) But the original way that Ryoko was intended to find out about Washu's past and Mikamo Niwase. Plus it was cute to write granny Washu, too :)

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"Well, hello there, koneko-chan."

Washu gazed down into the ornately carved wooden cradle, her green eyes softening as she took in the tiny pink bundle that lay there. The baby opened her eyes at the sound of the voice, kicking her legs beneath the soft white blankets. The action revealed a set of perfectly formed miniature toes and Washu hesitated, then reached down a tentative finger to touch them. The child stared at her, but she did not cry, and Washu smiled.

"You're supposed to be asleep." She said playfully. "You're already starting off life just like your mother - that's not a good thing, you know. Not listening to what you're told. If you don't sleep now then later you'll be grumpy and cross and then your mother will be grumpy and cross and some unsuspecting family member will find themselves on Nozomi-sitting duty for the evening. You've been warned. Mama isn't pretty when she's grumpy and cross...you don't want to have to see that."

The baby batted a curled fist against Washu's hand, and the scientist swallowed hard, running a gentle finger over the soft pink knuckles then taking the hand gingerly in hers.

"I'm pleased to meet you as well, Nozomi." She said softly. "You know, I never thought I'd have a family at all. And here I am, talking to you. Before I know it, you'll be calling me Obaa-san - and that's something I didn't think anyone would ever call me - not in a million years."

She grinned.

"Your father tells me you're going to be very pretty, when you're older...but I didn't have the fortune to meet you, then." She murmured, touching the infant on the cheek. "You have your mother's eyes - bright and curious and full of the world around you. But I see bits of your father in you too, koneko-chan. And you know, I think I'm glad I didn't meet that Nozomi. I'd rather know you for who you are, not who you might have been had things been different. The world has plenty of room for you to grow up and do your own thing. And if I have any say in the matter, I'll make sure that you get to do just that."

"What are you doing in here?"

A voice from the doorway startled her and she swung around guiltily, seeing her daughter watching her. She shrugged, stepping away from the cradle.

"She was awake...and disturbing my work." She said glibly. "That's all. You shouldn't leave her unattended, little Ryoko. She might need you, and she's too young to tell you just yet."

"Yeah, well, you'd know all about leaving babies unattended, wouldn't you." Ryoko muttered, folding her arms across her chest. "She's not sleeping because you're here distracting her. And you can't pretend that she was disturbing your work. For one thing, since we've been on Jurai, you haven't done a whole lot of work. And for another, I heard you talking to her. Koneko-chan? What on earth is that about?"

Despite herself Washu coloured, a sheepish look entering her emerald eyes. She shrugged.

"It's just a nickname. That's all. And I guess I was curious." She admitted. "I haven't seen very much of the bairn since she was born, and I suppose I wanted a chance to, when noone else was here playing sentry. I'm not going to hurt her, Ryoko. Contrary to what you might think, I'm not completely unequipped to deal with babies."

"She's been in the world four days and you're already giving her a nickname?" Ryoko stared. "Washu, she is not going to spend the whole of her life being called after a baby animal! Her name is Nozomi - could you please absorb that and learn to use it?"

"I have and I do." Washu seemed unperturbed. "There's really no need for you to be so overprotective of her, Ryoko. She's not in any distress. Actually, we were having quite a nice little chat, before you came in and interrupted it."

"A nice little chat with a baby who can't even say her own name yet?" Ryoko looked scornful. "And I'm not overprotective. Just, if you hadn't checked, she's my daughter. She isn't yours. And I didn't ask you to come up here and disturb her with your babble. You're half mad sometimes, and I don't want her to inherit that. So leave her be a while, okay? At least until she's old enough to develop a resistance to your particular brand of madness."

Washu eyed her daughter impassively for a moment, fighting against the melancholy that threatened to overwhelm her. There was silence, and Ryoko approached the crib, eying the infant as she did so. Washu watched her, biting her lip as she observed the clumsy, yet well-meant attempts the pirate made to communicate with her daughter. Despite herself, she could not keep control of her emotions, and the tears slid silently down her cheeks, splashing onto the edge of the cradle as she turned her face away.

"Washu?" Ryoko's voice had softened to an incredulous whisper, and Washu muttered the worst curse she knew in her native language, moving away from the cradle and across towards the window of the chamber. She did not reply, and she heard her daughter's muttered frustration behind her. Then there was a hand on her shoulder, as Ryoko roughly pulled her around, holding her face to face as they met gazes.

Washu swallowed, not trusting herself to speak as she saw the disbelief in her companion's amber eyes.

"Are you...crying?" She demanded. Washu closed her eyes, struggling to contain herself, but it was no good and she sighed, pulling free of Ryoko's grasp and sinking down onto the sill as she buried her head in her hands, fighting to relocate her composure. A gurgle from the cradle made her glance up instinctively, her gaze flitting across the room to the baby's safe den, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Ryoko frown, her own eyes moving between her mother and her baby.

At length the pirate sighed.

"I don't think I've ever seen you cry." She admitted. "Not even when you blew up Kihaku. Washu, what's gotten into you? You're scaring me. I mean, really scaring me."

Washu swallowed once more, finally getting herself under some control. She raised a wan smile to her companion.

"That's nothing new, surely?" She asked, attempting to inject some levity into her tone, but Ryoko was having none of it. She shook her head, and Washu could see genuine confusion in her eyes.

"Are you going to tell me, or do I have to beat it out of you?" She demanded now. "Because I will, if I have to - but I'm still not at full strength and rather not do it in front of the baby."

"Giving you up was the hardest decision I ever had to make." Washu spoke slowly, all forced humour gone from her words as she realised her companion was in earnest. "I never meant it to matter - you were an experiment. A project. An attempt at revenge. But you weren't, Ryoko. Maybe now you understand better than you ever could before. I know you've been worried - that Tsunami's prophesy for the other world will still somehow come to be. That someone will steal Nozomi and you'll never see her again. That...that was my reality. And my...my choice for you. But it doesn't mean I didn't regret having to do it."

"Washu..." Ryoko faltered, and Washu shook her head.

"You were born out of tragedy." She whispered, as her voice threatened to become uneven once again. "I lost someone very dear to me, at Kagato's hands, and it wasn't just the well-being of the universe I cared about. I wanted to kill him, but I had to find a way to do it, and that isn't easy when you're dealing with a Prince of Jurai. He was powerful. Very powerful. And what I did was insanity, but I did it anyway. Maybe I wanted a baby - maybe it was psychological. I don't know. I suppose I realised, when Mikamo died, that I'd never have one any other way. And even though you were Kagato's daughter, I still saw you grow every day. Sometimes I'd just sit and watch you kicking and turning somersaults. I'd talk to you. There'd be days when there was noone else there - just you and me. I couldn't bring Kichi into too much danger, so she wasn't with me all the time. And even though I knew she'd take you, I still pretended to myself that it wouldn't happen. That Mikamo wasn't dead and you were going to stay with me and somehow I'd have my family, after all."

Her voice broke on the last word, as the tears began to fall one more time, and Ryoko swore softly under her breath. She hesitated, then sank down on the sill beside her mother, putting an awkward arm around her shoulders.

"I didn't mean you couldn't come near Nozomi." She said quietly. "I was just annoyed because you woke her up. That's all."

"She was awake when I came in." Washu shook her head. "I was just going to peek at her, that's all. But she seemed to want me to stay. And...and I wanted to stay, Ryoko-chan. She reminded me..."

She took a deep breath, shaking her head.

"Look at me. You've made me silly now." She scolded. "With all this baby madness. I'm a scientist, and none of this is rational or logical."

Ryoko frowned.

"Stop trying to keep face. You can't fool me, not when you're crying like a newborn yourself." She said frankly. "You're setting Nozomi a bad example, so dry up already, will you? I have no clue what to do with tears, and I really have no clue what to do with your tears. Pull yourself together, Washu, please. This isn't like you. It just...it isn't."

"I know." Washu fumbled in her pocket for her hankerchief, wiping her eyes. "I guess it brought a lot of things back. You were such a cute baby, masume-chan. So very cute. And so alive. You have no idea how awful I felt, giving you to Kichi knowing that I was sending you off to be raised as an assassin. I always chose my own life, Ryoko. For good or bad, I did. On the whole, I'm glad you did the same. Even if we never did cross paths until more recently - I'm glad you had choices."

"I want Nozomi to have them, too." Ryoko glanced across at the cradle thoughtfully. "Whatever those choices are. Tenchi and I both chose to live on Earth so she wouldn't have to be something she wasn't. I know that we named her Nozomi, but in the circumstances, we kind of had to. But other than that, I'm not going to tell her about what happened in the past, or about the other Nozomi. I'd rather she chose her own path...I don't want her thinking that her future is set in stone."

"I agree." Washu nodded soberly. "She should have the right to choose."

Ryoko hesitated, then she shrugged.

"And the right to know her grandmother." She acknowledged ruefully. "I'm sorry, Washu. I guess I am protective. I mean, she is mine. And well, I don't want anyone else taking over. I...I don't know a lot of things, but I do know she belongs with me, and you're right, I suppose I still do worry about Tsunami's prophesy. Even though Kagato is really dead...I don't want to lose her."

"I know." Washu nodded. "And I understand."

She paused, then reached across to take Ryoko's hand, squeezing it tightly.

"After all, I never wanted to lose you either." She added with a sigh. "Sometimes I think I didn't, in the end. But other times I realise that no matter what happens, I really did lose you the day I gave you to Kichi. Those years can't be bought back - and Nozomi needs her mother. I wouldn't try and intervene in that, Ryoko. That's not my place. But I do want to be a part of building her future. After all, tentative as it is, this is the only family I really have, now. And even if things between us can never be fully healed, I have a clean slate with her. I'd like a chance to bond with her, because she has no reason yet to hate me."

"I don't hate you." Ryoko shook her head, getting to her feet as the child in the cradle let out a whimper. "I never have, although sometimes you drive me crazy. You like winding me up and it's annoying. That's all."

"Maybe I do." Washu nodded. "It's easier to tease than to be honest, and I'm not very honest with my feelings, most of the time. It's a bad habit of mine."

"I'd noticed." Ryoko said acidly, resting her arms on the edges of the cradle and gazing down at her small daughter. "Washu, what did you mean when you said you weren't inexperienced with babies?"

"Father used to involve Tokimi and I, when he'd visit people. Families. Whatever." Washu replied. "Sometimes we'd help out - on occasion we'd watch a baby or a toddler while the mother was blessed. That kind of thing. It was a long time ago, I know - but there's something innocent and endearing about little children. They haven't got to that stage where they ask awkward questions or want to break your heart. They're just cute and affectionate and yes, demanding - but special all the same."

"You sound positively soppy." Ryoko snorted. "What were you brewing before you came up here? From the way you're acting, it must have been something pretty potent."

"Nothing." Washu said ruefully. "Unfortunately I can't blame this whole embarrassing episode on any of my science, since I haven't been near the lab this morning."

"Which isn't like you, either."

"No, but I did have other things on my mind lately." Washu gestured towards the crib. "Are you going to just leave her to whimper, Ryoko, or are you actually going to pick her up?"

"Are you nagging me?"

"Yes. Does that make you feel more normal?"

"Actually, it does." Ryoko smiled sheepishly. "And to be honest, I'm not really good at picking her up. Usually someone else has to do it and give her to me. I don't want to drop her and the last time I tried I almost sent the duty nurse into a catatonic faint. She seems to think babies are delicate - and although I told her no daughter of mine is going to be a weakling, she didn't seem impressed."

Washu stared at her companion for a moment, then she burst out laughing.

"I can imagine." She said wryly. "Well, I can help - if you'll let me?"

"Since you're here, I guess so." Ryoko nodded. She shrugged. "I'm not really a natural at any of this. It's confusing and I don't know what I'm doing."

"That's half the fun of being a mother, though." Washu's tone softened as she gently lifted Nozomi up in her arms, cradling her for a moment, then holding her out to her companion. "Here. Take her gently and support her head. She might have to learn to be shock-proof, but right now she's still just a tiny."

"It's not easy to remember." Carefully Ryoko obeyed. "Baby-holding isn't something I do, generally."

"Well, it's something I suggest you learn, fast." Washu advised. "Because before you know it, we'll be flying back to Earth. Unless you and Tenchi have decided to stay here permanently."

"Like that would ever happen." Ryoko grimaced. "Not in this lifetime, Washu. I promise you."

"Going back suits me fine, too. Much as I like seeing Sasami and Ayeka, I like the Earth." Washu reflected. "There's always far too much going on on Jurai, and they expect you to get involved."

"Tell me about it." Ryoko rolled her eyes skywards. "Tenchi has been dragged into something this morning. Something Takeru wanted him to take part in - or do...I don't know. Men and their bonding. I swear that Takeru wants something, but I haven't figured it out, yet."

She sighed, glancing down at her daughter.

"I think she's going to sleep at last." She added. "Maybe she did just need some attention."

"Yours, by the looks of it." Washu smiled. "She is a beautiful baby, Ryoko. Although, if I'm honest, you were a cuter one."

"Really?" Awkwardly, and as if the child was made of glass, Ryoko set Nozomi back down in the cradle, pulling the blanket gently over her bare legs. "Or are you just saying that because we almost had a moment back then?"

"No, it's true. You were." Washu reflected. "I designed you, didn't I? Of course you were. You were gorgeous. It made it all the more difficult to give you up, though. Those eyes...I still swear to this day that the last thing I saw in them before I walked out the door was reproach. And I know I heard you crying, before I even got to the end of the street. This whole baby thing has opened up Pandora's box in a big way for me, Ryoko. I guess I didn't realise it would, till she was born."

Ryoko leant up against the wall, folding her arms across her chest and Washu could tell she was mulling this over. At length she offered her mother a rueful smile.

"We're a strange pair, you and I. And Tenchi is always saying you're fond of me." She said. "Or was that just while I was a baby? Have you gone off me, since then?"

"No...on balance I like you just the way you are." Washu grinned. "After all, a lot of your more annoying qualities you inherited from me, and I take a lot of pride in that fact."

Ryoko chuckled.

"You said that, not me." She responded, and Washu shrugged.

"It's the truth." She said playfully. "You may have Kagato's DNA, but you have more of me in your personality than you do him."

"I suppose that's a good thing."

"Well, neither one of us have a great track record in parenting." Washu suddenly looked sad. "But I at least made an effort, Ryoko. Even if I don't always say it - I stayed on the Earth because I wanted to be part of my daughter's life. No other reason. Just that."

"Really?" Ryoko looked taken aback. Washu nodded, looking embarrassed.

"Now I've laid my soul bare, I've nothing left to hide." She agreed. "Yes, Ryoko. Really."

"Well, then I guess I've a confession also." Ryoko admitted. "When you went to blow up Kihaku, I was frightened you weren't coming back. I wouldn't have stopped you going, Washu - but I didn't want you to die out there. When Tenchi flew Tsunami-fune back to Earth, I was as anxious about you as I was about him. I wanted you back safely too...even though you make me nuts."

Washu smiled.

"That's nice to know, musume-chan." She whispered. Ryoko hesitated for a moment, then she shrugged.

"We should let Nozomi sleep." She said off-handedly, but Washu knew she was trying to hide her awkwardness. "After all, that is what kittens spend their time doing, isn't it, Okaa-san?"

Washu's eyes softened, and she nodded her head.

"They do." She agreed.